Not trusting an adult around your child for whatever reason is one thing, and it is very much understandable. But if, as a parent, you draw such boundaries, then you should stick by them, but OP’s sister seemingly had her boundaries blurry, and OP was not having it. He posted on the “ AITAH” subreddit to seek Redditor’s opinions.
Cutting off Bad Influence
OP often takes his nieces (his brother’s daughters) out for fun activities. He also has a nephew (his sister’s son), whom he does not take to the fun activities because his sister does not want OP around her son.
OP was involved in some “illegal stuff” 8 years ago, which had him serve jail time for over a year. For this reason, his sister thinks OP would be a bad influence on her son.
Not Over Her Sibling’s Past
OP says he has since changed and has had what he describes as a stable life for years. He, however, chose not to fight it because, after all, it was her kid. The decision is hers. He never argued about it with her.
So, the cousins have been talking, and OP’s nephew just learned about the fun activities the girls get to do with OP, and he also wants in. The thing is, OP’s sister is not financially stable enough to take her son to the fun activities OP takes his nieces.
Next Level Entitlement
She now wants OP to give her the money so she can take her son to the activities too. OP instantly turned her down and made it clear that the whole point of taking his nieces out was so that they could bond.
However, he was gracious enough to let his sister know that he would gladly pay for her son to go out with them if she ever changed her mind.
He also allowed her to tag along with them if she did not trust him. However, if she chose this option, she would have to pay for her part of the activity because OP would pay for his nephew alone. Does OP’s actions make him an ***hole?
The Masses Weigh In
Commenters on the post were baffled at the audacity of OP’s sister. She needed to pick a side because it does not make sense to consider OP a bad influence but still be entitled to his money. One Redditor with this view said OP’s sister’s attitude was giving, “You’re not good enough for my child… but your money is.”
Another commenter said, “The fun things come with spending time with you. Your sister can’t have it both ways. Either your nephew gets to be around you for fun trips, or he doesn’t. You’re not obligated to give her money.”
“That’s one entitled sister. You suck; stay away but give me your money! NTA.” Added another user.
Gracious Uncle
OP was gracious enough to give his sister another chance without holding a grudge. Many would not offer to take the nephew with them even if the sister changed her mind.
One commenter said, “NTA, I just wanna add that you are an amazing man and uncle and are so willing to add your nephew if your sister lets you. It speaks much about how you don’t hold grudges. Don’t give her the money; I hope she relents and lets her son have a good relationship with you. As you said, she can come and see what’s up.”
Choices Have Consequences
A few other commenters agreed that OP’s sister was entitled to choose who her son could hang out with and who he could not. Although OP did not say what “illegal stuff” he was involved in, parents in the comment section stated that they would also have problems trusting their child with a sibling involved in “illegal stuff” even after reforming.
But the fact remains that if she cannot trust OP with her son, she has no right to the money OP spends on her nieces while bonding with them.
Your Sister Sounds Entitled
One commenter with these views said, “Your sister sounds pretty entitled. I mean, I get it. I have a family member I don’t trust with my kid. I love them, but four years of sobriety doesn’t clear the ledger of 20 years of BS. But that’s next-level BS of her to ask for the money.”
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This article was produced and syndicated by A Dime Saved.
Originally posted 2023-10-10 16:00:04.
