Groom’s Decision To Take Bride’s Last Name Raises Eyebrows


Quizzical man raising eyebrow, portrait.

Modern-day couples are eschewing many of the traditional elements of weddings. Brides today aren’t constrained by traditional dress codes, and it’s not uncommon to see them in casual footwear like sneakers. These days, you may even have pet attendants at your wedding.

Some men have begun to doubt the long-held tradition that their wives will take their surnames, and some have even chosen to adopt their spouse’s surnames. This is a case of a Reddit user considering adopting his future wife’s last name. His decision, however, has not been well received by his family.

Hear His Story

From the moment they first started dating, her family has treated him like one of their own. The members of his family, on the other hand, have said some pretty awful things about her during the length of their relationship and have basically labeled him an idiot for standing up for her and defending her dignity. Both of these factors and the fact that he prefers her family’s name over his own have contributed to his desire to adopt it.

He finds it disheartening that his parents have mostly supported him until he started seeing his fiance, despite some minor disagreements. They’ve been quite critical of her since day one and have never given her a fair chance.

On top of that, OP isn’t particularly attached to his surname to begin with. To him, it’s merely a name. Nothing else matters if his family doesn’t accept his decision and acknowledge how much she means to him. Yet, this has not been the case with her family; rather, they have welcomed him with open arms. Keeping with the tradition of honoring the family who has always stood by him and his fiancee appeals to him.

She also has been extremely accommodating of his family’s excesses. She stood by his side even after hearing his folks say dreadful things. For OP, he considers having her name an honor, and doing so would be the least he could do to show how much she and her family mean to him. He is, however, worried about how his fiance will feel about the concept, in addition to his family’s disapproval.

Surprisingly, the Girls Don’t Mind

Reddittors appear to have no problem with their man adopting their name. “A future spouse taking my name has been something I’ve always expected,” stated one. Some people don’t like it so much that they’re willing to give up their last name. Another poster on the thread explained that she felt a strong connection to her heritage through her family name and did not want to change it.

In the end, they merged their names into one, with him taking her surname as his second middle name. It would seem that OP’s only remaining option is to broach the subject with his future wife. A quick glance at the user comments reveals that this is hardly unprecedented, despite its out-of-the-ordinary appearance at first. It’s such a fantastic idea that OP doesn’t even have to defend it. Only the fact that he’s taking her surname just because he wants to is sufficient.

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Originally posted 2023-07-30 08:00:33.